uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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