And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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