the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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