Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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