Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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