Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
