we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
