I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
