i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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