Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
