Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
