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:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
