Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize