i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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