just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
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