he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
he puts the penis in happiness.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize