I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
My liver just broke up with me...
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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