I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
