well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
