just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize