I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize