jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
