Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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