Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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