that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He passed out mid-signature
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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