I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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