Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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