Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I am one with the molecules
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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