She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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