Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
