Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Be still, my beating vagina.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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