I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
