Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
