Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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