You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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