even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
