Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
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