Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
