An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
