There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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