guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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