The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Randomize
