Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
