so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
