it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
