the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
