She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
