Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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