what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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