i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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