I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
